Why do we whiff on building great friendships? We mess up in millions of ways. We have dozens of inch-deep friendships and sort of body surf over the crowd. Or we feel hurt and betrayed and wrap ourselves into a cocoon of isolation. Insert your “I’m really bad at friendships” scenario here.
Five great questions of life: Life * Love * Learning * Labor * Leadership
Four Ways to Be a Great FriendBy Evan Nehring
Why do we whiff on building great friendships? We mess up in millions of ways. We have dozens of inch-deep friendships and sort of body surf over the crowd. Or we feel hurt and betrayed and wrap ourselves into a cocoon of isolation.
Insert your “I’m really bad at friendships” scenario here.
But Jesus calls us friends (John 15:15). And the Bible is full of great friendship advice, like Proverbs 18:24:
A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
I really want friends who stick close, and I want to be that kind of friend. These four tips are revolutionary.
Pray for them.In Philippians 1:9-11, Paul gives an example of how to pray or intercede for someone. I break it down with this little acrostic:
- P – People people.
- A – Aware of what is excellent and what destroys.
- L – Loaded with spiritual fruit.
People people. Pray that your friends would have a deepening love for people.
And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, (Philippians 1:9)Aware of what is excellent and what destroys. Pray for purity. The word is sometimes used of pure bread dough that is unmixed with leaven. All good and no evil, that’s the goal.
…so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, (Philippians 1:10)Loaded with spiritual fruit. When Paul talks about fruit, he’s talking about godly character in our lives. In Galatians, Paul talks about the fruit of the spirit being love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. So we pray for the fruit of righteousness and character in their lives!
…filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God. (Philippians 1:11)
- Newborn babies
- Job Changes
- Loss or trauma
- A new church role
Sometimes, being a friend just means being there.
Am I suggesting that good memories are worth savoring and painful memories are worth forgetting? Yes, I am.
And by all means, take snapshots! Share ‘em online. Print ‘em out. It’s like printing money.
QuestionSo that’s my close friend formula. If you would rush out and do one of these things, which one would it be?
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